What do you call it? Blame, impact???

I was in an emotionally abusive relationship. I am seeking therapy and it is a long, winding road to get back where I once was. Even though I try to move forward, my ex tries to find ways back into my life. Recently he said I can’t blame others for my mental health. While I agree, blame isn’t the right word, I wish he would take accountability for the impact of his abuse. There are the short and long term effects I am dealing with from the abuse. Is it wrong to say that another person impacted my mental health? Or is it just another way for him to manipulate me?