Being lonely, but also don't like social gatherings and groups of people

Well, I sense, I am a bit lonely. But also, the duality is there: I miss people. I left a group of friends and am like alone a lot. I love that. But in a way I also am a bit like secluded of society. For instance, I really don't like the “forced” gatherings like Christmas or birthdays. But yeah, I would like to have some profound and calm friends. I sense it is hard to make new friends.

I did try the last 5 years to form a walking/hiking group, try to meet new people, place some things on social media and websites. Or a group that would like to sit and talk, but it is not like common. It is more common to go to a nice, crowded coffee bar in the city. I can see it can be scary or uncomfortable to meet someone new during a walk. So I see the good thing about getting together in a bar. Or something like that.

The thing is, how to find the quiet or calm people? They are also not in the open and at the extravert wild crowded places. And form like a group? That would be cool. Or to find friends, even. I am 33 now, I am a male. And I also am a short person, I feel different and look different. So I feel, I embrace myself And love to be with myself, I'm proud. This last part is not really a deal about making friends or finding people, but just wanted to share that part too.