Do i tell my friend that everyone thinks that she shouldn’t marry her fiancé?

Ok so my (20f) friend (21f) is getting married this November. When she first told me that she was getting engaged soon I was so excited! I love weddings! But soon after she got engaged, all the red flags started popping up.

So for context, she met her now fiancée in February 2022 and is getting married in November 2022. Now I’m not judging on the time frame because sometimes it works! Everyone thought that they were just good friends and was kinda taken back when she said they we’re getting married.

So the reason why I feel like I should say something is because she seems genuinely unhappy with this whole wedding thing. I totally understand that wedding planning can be incredibly stressful!! But every time that I talk to her about how it’s going she just seems pissed. So I think to myself that maybe every time we see each other I just get her on a bad day. But then I talk to her mother (her family lives down the street from me and we are good family friends) and her mother says that she has done nothing for the wedding because bride doesn’t tell her anything. I asked if there was a bridal shower at all and the mother said yes. “Yes there is going to be a bridal shower. But I have zero clue when it is going to be. Bride has decided that she wants nothing to do with planning the bridal shower. So aunt and sister are the ones who are trying to plan it” Now keep in mind, i am writing this in october. Almost mid october. I thought that tue shower would’ve happened already, but who knows.

Now she also asked if I would plan the bachelorette party and I said hell ya! I was so excited to plan this because I also love to host. She gave me the numbers of all the bridesmaids (there are 10 including me) so finding a date that would work for most of the girls was hard. We decided the date in September and set the date in October. About a month after we set the date I get a text from my friends fiancé asking if I could call him. So I say give me 10 minutes and then I call him. And he starts asking questions about the bachelorette and what we’re doing, we’re not doing anything crazy so I explain to him the things that we we’re gonna do and he said “that sounds fun! But now I have a question.“ so at this point I had no clue what he could ask but then he said “is there anyway that we could change the date? I know you set the date back in September, but my two sisters who are bridesmaids, who will also be her future sister-in-law‘s, won’t be able to make it to that date.” I only heard from 1 sister that she couldn’t make it. And besides the one sister and one other bridesmaid who will be out of the country at the time, we had 8 who were going. 8 out of 10? Pretty solid amount. So when he said BOTH sisters couldn’t go, not a big deal. 7 out of 10 is still fantastic. So I messaged each one of the girls individually and asked them if they would be willing to change the date but every single bridesmaid that is attending said that they have already why I asked work off and they have already planned around as so they would rather not change the date. And I was 100% with them so I texted back my friends fiancé and said “I am so sorry I asked all the girls if they could change the day and they also that they don’t want to so we’re just gonna stick with the one we planned“ I never heard a word from him back.

I could go on and on about other things that are red flags. I’ve got an entire list, so if you need more let me know. But her parents, the other bridesmaids (besides sister-in-laws) and her aunts who are planning this wedding think that it’s a horrible idea for her to go through with this. I’m hanging out with her again this Friday, do i say anything to her ? Or should I keep my mouth shut and just be happy??

UPDATE So the bachelorette party was this last weekend. The party itself was so much fun!! All the bridesmaids had a blast.

But the bride didn’t seem to have anything good to say about fiancé. Kind of a long party😅

UPDATE #2 Wedding happened. It was quite something. Several things happened.

First off, MIL wore white. Her dress was supposed to be navy blue. Like the MOTB dress. I asked the father of bride knows and it was a total surprise. I mean, it’s something she would totally do, but we all hoped and prayed she wouldn’t

Second, the SIL’s wore a completely different dress than the rest of the bridesmaids. Similar color, but the style was completely different. It was incredibly obvious that they were different

Third, the grooms side of the family kept throwing backhanded comments towards the brides family, but the brides family are all shy and timid so they never said anything back

Fourth, at the reception while bride was getting touch ups, she told her aunt who was helping her “ya know, my life just started, and i already wish it was a better one” ????? Personally, that’s not good

Fifth, the brides little sister (who is 16, I’ll call Ann) went to go see if bride needed anything while she was getting ready for the reception. The MIL wouldn’t let Ann into the brides dressing room. The MIL turned to Ann and said “is bride always this bitchy? Because she’s always like this whenever she’s around my family” after Ann said she’s never like this at home the MIL said “well can you fix her? Because this is a big day for my family. She needs to get her attitude in check” Ann then said there was nothing she could really do. MIL then said “well then your completely useless here. So go be useless somewhere else” not cool to say to a 16 yr old girl

Sixth, i was talking to Ann at the reception and she told me that her and bride had a chat the week before the wedding. Bride was having a mental break down about the whole thing when Ann said “hey, I know this is a big day and i know it’s stressful, but it’s only one day. Life will get better after this is all over!” Then bride looked right at Ann and said “If I marry groom, my life will never get better” that absolutely broke my heart

There were several other things, but these were the top ones in my opinion. They’re in Cancun for a week, so let’s hope they turned their phones off and told the in laws to back off